Abandon The Date If Their Late

Tick Tock Tick Tock

I am sure all of you at some point have been waiting in your fancy clothes on your first date and then you look at the clock and your date is so late..

WTF right? 

Well let me inform you that you are not alone and it's time to call them and cancel and not make another date.  If they don't answer then so be it and ditch the looser.

This is a very bad sign that the person is a dud right from the beginning. 

Sure it is completely different if they are having trouble finding your house but they have called once or twice.. But the no phone call and you are waiting patiently with your hair done and you are trying not to get animal fur all over your brand new black dress.

I had a first date once and I called them after they were 30 minutes late and he was sleeping!  For some reason I decided that I would go out with him anyways..

I SHOULD NOT HAVE RECONCIDERED MY DECISION AS HE WAS SUCH A LOOOOOOOOSER! 

It should be a  huge red sign from up above that they DO NOT deserve you.

Didn't you spend all day getting ready and making sure that your makeup, hair and everything was just perfect. Did you call all your friends because you were so excited?

They on the other hand just didn't care as much as you and it won't get better.. TRUST ME!

This is a sign that they are good for nothing.  This is the type of person that after you have gone out with them for a couple of months get disgusting and lazy and always "forget" to call you.

You are a strong and sexy person and you will not take this anymore.  You deserve better and if you stand up for yourself than you will always get the best.

You probably want a person that is so into you.  You want someone that loves you for you and tries to make you laugh and cheer you up when things get bad..

This person on the other hand is late and cannot even get to you on time when a first date is the best way to make a first impression.

Ditch the Dummy and you will thank me.. :)

How To Make Yourself Stand Out

Do you tend to blend in with the background and your sick of it? 

These are some easy steps you can take to get yourself noticed 

1. Pick out clothes that not everyone would wear.  Use bright colors and big, bold accessories.  Don't over do it though or you'll be noticed and it won't be for the good.  Try to bring back fads.. The acid jeans are back now.. Who would have guessed?  Someone wore those and it was different so now everyone is wearing them.. See, different attracts attention.


2. Be confident.  Even if you fake it. (which you shouldn't cause your fabulous)  Everyone admires confidence.  Confidence looks go0d on everyone unless you are conceited.. That is not a good look for anyone.


3. Be who you are.   Be happy with who you are and everything that you stand for.  Be the best you possible.


4. Do something dramatic like dye your hair an awesome color or get a hair cut that is fashionable and might possibly start a new great trend.


5. Smile!  Not a lot of people smile anymore or say hi so make sure your the one that tries to brighten someones day.  A smile is really all you need. 


6. Eye Contact - Keep eye contact for more than just a couple of seconds.  If a guy or girl is checking you out, some good eye contact will make them sizzle.


7. Do something crazy.. If it's a party and everyone is playing "Truth or Dare" then participate and take on a dare and do it to your fullest.  If it's a theme day at work.. Go crazy with a costume.  Just make sure you always stand out and go overboard. :)


8. Don't be afraid to laugh out loud.  A laugh is contagious and if someone hears you laugh perhaps it just might make their day too.  Always try and be witty and friendly.


9. Do something nice for someone.  Buy them flowers for no reason or help someone across the street.  This world is sometimes out to get you and it's refreshing when someone goes out of their way to help another.


10. Try something different.  Stars sometimes do crazy things to get the public to notice them.  Example:  Try painting one of your nails a different color.

I hope these Tips have helped you.  Let me know if they work! lesliestar@lesliestar.ca

Online Dating - Pro's and Con's

Should I or Shouldn't I?

There is a huge booming industry of online dating sites.. Everyone seems to be looking for their one true love.  The question is .. Will you ever find true love through online dating? 

I have personally met a lot of really cool friends online and I think that it is totally possible to find true love anywhere and it doesn't stop at Online dating. 

There are sites like www.plentyoffish.com, www.matchmaker.com, www.lavalife.com and www.eharmony.com.  All these sites are helpful but how will you ever really know if the person really is who they say they are?  I guess that's true face to face too, however most of the time you can tell whether or not they are shady in real life.

Here are some PROS and CONS on Online Dating

PROS

• You  meet a lot of really cool people.  If you don't like them after a bit you can always delete them or hit ignore.  It is much harder in person to do something like that.


• You can be yourself behind the computer.  There is no face to face nervousness and you can just relax and talk and even make yourself sound smarter than you actually are. :)


• You could potentially meet the love of your life online.  There are millions of people to hook up with and chat and you can pick and chose who you like talking to and the best part is you can decide when and if you want to kick this person to the curb or keep them close.


• If you have trouble meeting people than this is a great way to do it.  No pressure and you can decide who you want to talk to.


• There isn't really a fear of rejection.  If the person that you are digging doesn't respond.. It's no big deal.  Move on to the next potential love..


• You can look up what the other person likes/dislikes, what they like to do for fun, and their age.  People who are older and don't get out much can easily look for their people in their age group and they don't even have to talk to them yet.

CONS

• It's not a very good way to socialize.  Get out in the real world and try and pick someone up.  It's not healthy to be in your house all day typing on the computer till 6pm and you still haven't brushed your hair and your in your pajamas.  That will not get you a mate in real life.


• Not everyone is who they say they are.  You have to be really careful when talking to people you don't know.  They could arrange to meet and then kill you.. You don't know if they are a good person.  Plus.. they don't have the same friends as you, so you could probably never track them down if they ripped you off or something.


• Sometimes you get stalkers online.  This is never a pretty situation.  Just hit delete or ignore and never give out your personal information.  If they continue to harass you by logging on with a different name over and over again contact the webmaster by email and let them in on the situation.


• There are a lot more men than women in the Internet dating world.  Most men are there to have cyber sex to the few women that there are on there.  Stay away from these pigs unless you like that sort of thing.  In this case perhaps it could be a PRO. :)


• Some people sign up for online dating just to get online passwords and information to scam people.  If it's too good to be true it probably is folks.


• If you think you are talking to a tall, dark and handsome guy you probably are totally wrong.  The picture is probably of some model that they just ripped off the net.  Never believe anything until you see it.  Perhaps suggest a web chat?


• They might be married or in a relationship.  That actually happened to me once.  My boyfriend didn't call me for Christmas one year and I found out it was because he was too busy writing to chicks on Christmas to phone me.  Be careful who you pick and try and do a google search on them if possible.

If you have anymore pros or cons or have had some bad experiences with online dating, please email me at lesliestar@lesliestar.ca

Don't Procast.. Dump Their Ass

Are you Unhappy with your Mate?

Do you feel like you are doomed to be with this looser for the rest of your life? 

If you feel this way.. it is your choice to make a change.  No one can do it for you. 

Listen.. You only live once, so don't waste your precious time dealing with the other person's issues.

If you get a feeling like it just isn't working anymore than it probably isn't. 

Have you done everything you possibly could to try and make things better?  Sometimes people just aren't right for each other and it doesn't necessarily mean that they did something wrong or it's your fault. 

That is why you have to search to find your perfect match.  Everyone has a perfect match. It's just a matter of finding the right one and sometimes that seems like it could never happen to you.  It can, so don't stick around with someone just because they are the only one that is there.. You deserve better than that.

You deserve someone that is going to love you for you and that will love you even at your worst.  Don't give up!

Signs of an Unhealthy Relationship

• Do you find that your mate brings you down and no matter how happy you are they just never crack a smile or seem to be interested in what you say?  It's time that you call it quits..


• Do they always have more important things to do and you don't seem to be top priority?


• Do you fight more often than you actually get along?


• Do you bring out the best in each other or the worst?  If you bring out the worst than you both are making each other miserable.. It's time to go your separate ways.


• Do you think they are cheating and you just don't trust them?  If you have a hunch they are cheating then they probably are.  Look for signs like ... if they buy new shoes or all of a sudden care how they look.. Or a lot of all of a sudden working overtime... Or they never want to have sex.  A GUY WILL NEVER TURN DOWN HAVING SEX SO IF THEY DO SOMETHING IS UP!


• Do they never call you back when they say they are going to?  This is a sign that they just aren't that into you.  I know sometimes it hurts and you experience denial.. but it's true.. Would you forget to call them if they wanted you to?  Probably not.. there's your answer.


• Do you both trust each other and respect each others opinions?  I am sure that you will not agree on everything but when you disagree does your mate make you feel like your opinion doesn't matter?  If so.. Ditch the looser cause your opinion matters just as much as theirs..


• Does he or she get physical when you get into a fight?  It is never ok to hit someone and make them feel bad about themselves.  GET OUT NOW before it gets worse.. Also mental/verbal or emotional abuse you should end it too.  You are way too good of a person to put up with abuse..


• I'm all for trying to work it out but when that's all you ever do, it probably says something about your relationship.  Work on it if you think it's worth working out.. but otherwise.. GET YOURSELF BACK ON TRACK and start finding out what you actually want in life. 


• When you make plans to do something with your boyfriend/girlfriend do you feel stressed and angry that you have to see them?  Do you not care anymore about them but you don't know how to change the way you feel?  You should never try and procrastinate breaking up with someone.  If you feel so strongly that you are just not liking them anymore than I do suggest a breakup talk.  You should be happy to see your partner and not stressed out and pissed off about it.


• Does your mate keep you from doing the things you really love to do in life?  As long as it doesn't take all your time away from them, then you should be able to arrange a schedule where you can do both things and keep everyone happy.  It is not ok to ignore your partner though when you are doing it.  It should be an equal relationship and when the other person gets cast aside for an activity like video games that makes them feel inferior to it.. Be careful how you treat your mate as you should be able to find a happy medium. 


• Do you have a completely different life and it's not for the better since you started seeing this person? Do you not see your friends anymore ?  This is unhealthy and it is never a good thing if you ditch your friends for a new relationship.  Sure at the beginning you will want to see that person all the time, but when you start to isolate yourself  from everyone that you love this is so lame.  The best relationships are when you can be yourself with the love of your life. You should never change who you are for them.

It is most important to find out who you really are and to love yourself first.  Find out what sort of things you really need in a relationship and what sort of fun you really need in life.  Your life is yours and don't let anyone else control it or take it away from who you really are.

The 10 Best Ways To End A Relationship

Have you ever been in a relationship where you just feel like it won't be going anywhere and you really don't have feelings for the other the way you use to? 

Are you scared to end it because of the way you think they will react?  Well grow some courage cause you can't live like this forever. 

It's your life and it's time to take it by the horns and live it the way you want to.

Here are some ways to break up the relationship and make your life a little easier.

1. Never call the person on the phone unless you have a long distance relationship and by long distance I don't mean like 2 hours away or less because you can drag your ass to see them to break up with them face to face.  Anyone that breaks up over the phone is completely chicken sh*t!


2. Lots of people prefer to take their soon to be ex mate out for coffee or a public place so just in case they totally freak out at least there will be people to protect them.  This is way is kind of iffy because I know I wouldn't be pleased if someone broke up with me in front of everyone.  It's not fun to be a crying mess in public.


3. Another way to end the relationship is to tell them to meet you somewhere.  Make sure they have a ride though because it's never fun looking a frightful mess with your mascara running down your face on public transportation.  A park perhaps or at their house or yours to have some privacy.


4. Never say .. "It's not you it's me."  That is the worst thing to say.  Obviously it's not or you wouldn't be breaking up with them.


5. Tell the truth.  If the person is too controlling or talks to much then tell them they do so.  That way they can perhaps try and change that about them selves.  If they are never told what they are doing wrong then how will they know to change it?


6. Women needs closure.  If your a guy and just think after a long term relationship that you can just end it and never see them again you have another thing coming.  Women like to talk about what went wrong.  Just bare it for their sake as it helps them to get over the hurt faster.


7. Don't just stop calling them or contacting them.  This is a really bad way to do it.  Confront the situation and act like the bigger person.  What's the worse thing that could happen?  Unless they are completely crazy and that's why you are breaking up with them.  In cases like these answer the phone.. tell them how you feel and if they over react and go nuts then just change your number.  If it gets worse and they stalk you then please get the authorities involved


8. Get straight to the point.  There is no sense in talking about past memories on how everything use to be so great because it brings up old feelings and things could get messy.  Just tell them what went wrong and why you are doing what you are doing.  Don't be alarmed when the dumpie starts to cry or act all nuts.  People can change completely when they are being dumped and act a fool. 


9. Please DO NOT break up in an email.  Sure it is easier and you can write down all the things that you want to say outloud but you too scared to but it is unfare and you will look like a scum bag.   Perhaps write down the things you want to say first and you can work them out before actually approaching the person face to face.


10. Try using the "I need to talk to you as a friend as we are friends too.. I don't know how to say this but.. "  If you tell them that you need a friend to talk to about this then perhaps they will be more open minded. 

Everyone knows that breaking up with someone can sometimes be horrifying and ugly but it's all about the way you handle.  Take some time to consider the other persons feelings but put yourself first and don't go back to your mate if they start crying and you don't want them to be hurt because trust me.. if you have wanted to break up with them now.. then in a couple of months it probably won't be any better.

If you have any other tips on how to end a relationships then email me at lesliestar@lesliestar.ca

You Can Still Be Fashionable At Work

Sick of the same ol' khaki's and boring work shirts?

You can change this easily without spending a lot of money. 

All you need is a few things to spice up your work wardrobe.

Guys

Get black dress pants and a whole whack of white dress shirts.  White only lasts for so long before they start to turn yellow so it's important to always have a clean white pressed shirt around.  You can match black dress pants and a white shirt with almost everything.

• Get a pair of white, black and brown shoes.. Depending on if it's summer time or not, wear appropriate sandals and not flip flops because they are so unprofessional for the work place.


• If your a handsome gentleman then you will need some ties for those pesky dress up days at work.  Get ties that you think will match with a lot of things.. ex. blue, black and striped.


• Buy an expensive suit.  This is something that you must not cheap out on unless there is a huge sale.  An expensive suit will last you a life time.  Suits always come in handy too..


• Buy a briefcase if you carry a lot of papers back and forth to work.  Go to Fossil or someplace nice to get one.  It is important that you look like you have a lot of money even if you don't.. Especially if you want a chick.


• If you have casual day at work, buy a couple pairs of new jeans and neutral colored dress shirts or sweaters.  Just because it's casual day doesn't mean that you can look like a complete slob.


• Buy dress socks too.  There is NOTHING WORSE than wearing nice dress shoes with a bulky sport sock sticking out.  You can buy nice dress socks in any department store and they are comfortable too and cool for summer.


• If you have a job where you are working with equipment and you are on your knees a lot and you don't want to ruin your clothes then stop by Marks Work Warehouse or some place that has clothes that were made to work in.


• Buy some undershirts that you can wear with dress shirts.  It is so gross to see guys nipples through their nice shirts unless they have an outstanding body.  You can buy cheap dress shirts at some place like Walmart.


• Keep your hair under control.  Don't wait so long to get your hair trimmed that you have bangs.  Also keep clean shaven as it starts to get shaggy looking after a couple of days.  Buy some wax for your hair to keep those frizzies down.  You don't have to buy a top name brand for it to work.  I have heard that products like Fructis work well and cause no flakes.

Girls

We are lucky because there are a lot of sophisticated jewelry or purses to make an outfit look outstanding.  You can make a simple white dress shirt and black dress pants look classy with some pearls and a neutral purse color.

• Buy supportive under garments.  There is nothing worse than having a bra that is too small or your underwear lines sticking out from your granny panties


• Buy a couple of suits.  You should buy a brown, black and pin striped one.  If it's summer then buy a nice linen suit but make sure to get it dry cleaned often as it crinkles easily.


• Buy neutral colored purses.  They will go with dressy items as well as jeans.  Also buy a nice red or colored purse as it could easily spice up a nice black suit.


• Buy clothes that say a lot about you.  If you like hippy things than try and portray that in a professional manner.  No one is saying that you can't be who you are, but you just have to dress it up.


• If you are plus sized and you find it hard to find clothes that fit you, then go to Major Department stores.  They usually carry more than just a size 0.  I am plus sized and I shop at The Bay, Sears or Reitman's. 


• Always buy quality over quantity.  Sure it's nice to have tons of purses that you got on sale but when the zipper breaks after only a week then you will have to buy another one anyways.  Always spend more to get more.


• A great place to buy cheap jewelry is at Claire's.  Make sure that the pieces you buy don't look as cheap as they really are.  I do suggest you purchase real jewelry and not cheap as the silver look will soon fade and tarnish. 


• Buy shoes that are work appropriate.  Don't be wearing hooker looking heels to work or it will get people talking and they won't be saying good things.  Wear cute flats from places like NINE WEST or get low kitten heels as you can usually wear them all day. It's awful to walk all day in your painful high heels.


• Try not to bring the runway to work.  What is popular on the runway probably isn't work appropriate.


• Keep your makeup to a minimum.  Don't go to work with the newest MAC sparkle eye shadow on as your boss probably won't be very happy with you.  Keep your nail polish clean and chip free.  It always looks nasty when your finger nails look dirty.


• Do not wear flip flops to work.  I love them just as much as anyone but it looks trashy and unkempt.  Invest in some nice HUSH PUPPY sandals as they will last a long time and you can wear them for hours and they won't hurt your feet.


• If you have to take a lap top with you to work every day please don't use a plastic bag for it.  You can buy fashionable lap top bags at places like ROOTS.  That is where I got mine and it is still going strong after 2 years.


• Buy nice dress socks or panty hose.  As I told the guys:  There is nothing worse than wearing sport socks with work attire.


• Please do not wear running shoes on casual day unless they are brand new.  It looks super sloppy.  You can pick up flats that are more causal looking with cute detailing that are still comfortable or PUMA type runners that don't really have long laces that get in the way.


• Buy clothes that fit you.  Don't buy shirts that are too small and your button looks like its going to pop off.  You can still get attention from the hotties at work without looking like your wearing your little sister's club clothes.


• To dress up an outfit don't be afraid to show a little skin.  However it is very important not to show too much.  You will be talked about as the office slut so be careful how you do it.  If you are wearing a shirt than don't wear a sleeveless shirt unless it's casual day.  Wear a cute cardigan over it and it will look classy and cute.


• Lastly. .. Make sure your hair is professional looking.  If you are going gray please dye your roots cause it looks so awful.  Also keep your hair out of your face.  A great hair do for work is if you set your hair in hot rollers and when they are ready quickly put your hair back in a pony tail.  Also look for professional looking hair accessories.  You can usually buy them for cheap and they can really make a great outfit look even better.

I hope that my tips have helped you.  If you have any more tips for looking great at work, please email lesliestar@lesliestar.ca

How To Deal With Rude People

Steps To Take To Make Them Back Off

Are you ever faced with someone that just gets under your skin 'cause they are so god da*med rude? 

I get faced with this on a day to day basis, as I am sure most of you do. 

Sometimes I would really just like to tell them what I think about them and slap them in the face.. but that won't get you anywhere I have learned.

The trick is to make them your best friend.  As my parents have always said.. " You get more bees with honey than you do with vinegar",which means that if your nice to others (even the bastards) you will attract more people.

I am in this situation now where this one guy is so rude to me and chooses not to say good morning to me or even acknowledged that I sit right beside him.  At first I was very angry with him and I questioned myself cause maybe I said something to offend him.  Just like right now when I was writing this he said "hi" to someone that just walked into the room but didn't say hello to me this morning.  GRRRR

I have decided that I haven't done anything wrong and he's just a complete asshole.  I have ignored him in the mornings too for a while now and decided not to say anything to him.  However I think that if I grit my teeth and actually be nice to him maybe that will work.

It really depends on how much you dislike this person.  I am not the type of person that will let anyone walk over me and treat me like shit, so not saying something is very difficult for me.

Top 10 Tips on How to Make the Situation Better for Yourself

1. The next time someone does something to really annoy you or just make you feel low, take a breather and ask yourself if it's really worth ruining your day over.  In most cases it definitely won't be.  No one should ruin your day.

2. Simply try and avoid them at all costs.  If they really make you feel terrible and they are constantly bringing you down, just stay away from them completely.  You can still sit beside someone and pretend they are not there.

3. Don't take anything that they say or do seriously.  Do they really matter that much to you that they could make your day awful?  Just feel sorry for them because they are such jerks and move on.

4. Talk to your friends and family about the situation and ask them for advice.  I am sure that they have been in this situation before so they have more experience than you perhaps.  Your friends are there for you and wouldn't want you to feel bad so they will help you feel stronger and fight back with your words and hopefully not your fists cause that is not how you deal with it.

5. Sometimes people just have rotten lives and take it out on people and they don't even realize they are doing it, but if you think it's just about you then maybe they don't like you.  WHO CARES!! There is people that you don't like but you don't mess with them.  Maybe they just need to grow up and learn to handle the situation.. Perhaps they should read this article. :)

6. Feel better about being you.  Don't let little pests ruin your day.  If you feel more confident about yourself than little things like this won't bother you.  Go out and spend a night out with your friends and have a drink and go shopping.  Retail therapy always works for me!

7. Confront them.  If it is really bothering you and you feel this is the only way to let them know how they are making you feel then tell them.  You don't have to stoop down to their level or anything, just tell them how they make you feel.  You might not get anywhere with this because the person is so angry about something but at least they will know now to either stay away from you or treat you a little better.

8. Don't expect miracles.  A rude person is probably not going to suddenly be your best friend because you let them know they hurt your feelings. 

9. Be nice as pie to them.  This is another way to get around the situation.  FAKE IT!  I know this probably isn't going to make you feel any better but be so nice to them that they have to like you.  It makes them wonder why they never liked you to begin with.

10. These rude people have no class at all.  You know that you are a great person and no matter what happens keep your dignity and try not to look like the victim.  No one should ever make you feel bad about yourself.  Stand up for yourself but do it in a polite and firm manner.  Don't let the tough guys ruin your spirits.  Meditate for a moment and relax and drink some green tea or listen to your favorite song.  Try not to react right away as your emotions will probably get in the way.  Think about what you are going to say first before you react.  You will thank for me for that later..  :)

I hope I have helped you with these rude bullies.  If you have any more questions please email me at lesliestar@lesliestar.ca :)